About Loving Your Hair

Me happy and content, at peace.

Hello Lovelies!
I have been planning this post for the longest time and finally found the right words.

About the time I was fighting against my hair..
Some years ago, actually quite a long time ago after I finished high school I just had a moment when suddenly I understood what loving your hair really means. See, I have very coarse curly and thick hair that is super dry when not properly taken care of with sheabutter leave in and coconut oil. 
But my hair type is not really common in Europe - I had no idea what to do with my hair or how to take care of it. The girls in my high school class all had blonde fine and shiny super/straight hair with lots of layers. And you know what - I really wanted to look like these girls! I was flat iron my hair to get my curls and waves out, damaging my hair nearly beyond repair. And this was not enough - I dyed it bleach blonde as well. My structure became even worse of course in between washes and I was never able to achieve the silky smooth look I wanted so badly. Leave alone that when my hair is too short it curls and frizzes even more leaving me with the look of a little hedgehog.

It took some time for me to realise that I should really appreciate what I do have and start making the most out of it. Once I embraced my hair structure, colour and thickness and started growing my hair long, it really only then revealed it's beauty. Before believe me - it was a hot frizzy mess. 

No matter what type of hair you have - if straight, curly thin or thick, firstly you got to start loving it. It will only make you unhappy if you are trying to be something that you are not and it will always look fake as well. 

You can take baby steps, this is what I did. 
  1. What hair structure do you have? Straight? Great! Try out hair styles that will not change your structure and give you a silky smooth look - e.g. the lazy wrap bun which does not give you bun waves. Curly? Try to nuture your hair with aloe vera gel, use the t-shirt towel method and try conditioning only to keep your moisture in and your curls crunchy. Wavy? You are like me, I am sure your hair will be very happy about braids at night with some hair oil in it so that you hair can keep it's natural waves. You hair will be most happy when you let it be in it's own natural structure and reward you with shine and non/frizz :)
  2. Colour! Are you in the silvery blonde or ashy blonde department? Try a silver shampoo that let's your hair shine and removes yellowing from the sun. You are a golden blonde or dark golden blonde? Wonderfull, try chamomile rinses and if you want to go lighter - lemon rinses to naturally lighten up your hair. You have black hair? You lucky one, normally you don't need to do anything. So many people are jealous because you have naturally the most shine. But why not try black tea rinses to add a burgundy glow to your hair and indigo once your greys start to show up. You are a brunette or red head? Wonderful you can use henna rinses, henna glow or henna treatments to intensify your own redness like I do. I use a hair treatment once a month with 2,5 cups of cassia (''colourless henna'') 1 tablespoon of henna and 1 tablespoon of Amla and 2 tablespoons of Shishakai. It gives my natural auburn just enough ginger shimmer in the sun without really changing my hair colour. 
  3. Hair State! Well firstly we need to start pampering your hair. Try to be gentle. No heat please at all costs if possible, unless you live in the antarctica and are inuit. Be nice to your hair - take your time brushing, use a good smooth wooden comb or my favourite - a horn comb. Use good ingredients - there are affordable organic options for all budgets and even good affordable silicone free products.You don't need to spend a ton on expensive salon products or super high marketed organic options. Listen to your hair - is it dry? Do a deep conditioning treatment before each wash. Is it very oily? Use a mild shampoo and try to stretch your washes so it gets used to produce less oil. 

Wise saying. Beauty.
Now, it might be that you are still fighting against your hair in one or another sense. But I do have some tips for you. Believe me every hair type and colour is beautiful. You have trouble seeing that? Go to pinterest and google your hair type, you will find thousands of beautiful pictures of your natural hair state. Make your own inspirational board :) 

I believe that once you make peace with yourself - your hair you will always look beautiful. I find the most beautiful people are the ones that are content and always look at the bright side. Your hair might be super frizzy - but it sure does make a gigantic beautiful thick braid as well. Try to always focus on the good aspects. The bad things will vanish and mostly the things you find vaults in are beautiful for other people. Beauty always lies in the eye of the beholder. Such a very true wise saying. This also applies for other things, like your body type, your colours and complexion, your height and many other things. Never forget that we all struggle to an extent and even the prettiest person might be extremely insecure and awkward in certain areas. Once you radiate your own inner peace - you will always be beautiful. Inside and out. 


  1. Wonderful commentary...thanks for educating and inspiring ladies around the world ♥

    1. You are very welcome, thank you for the lovely comment!

  2. Wonderful commentary...thanks for educating and inspiring ladies around the world ♥

  3. As I told you through instagram, those words are so inspiring.
    To stop me from dyeing my hair every month, from trying to avoid bad products and spend some more on reliable ones that will condition and treat my hair much better.
    It's such a delight reading you, thank you! :)

    1. Dear Martu, yes I am so happy about instagram, makes commenting and talking so much easier! I am sure that with time your steps will pay back and reward you with long beautiful hair :)

  4. Thank you Zoey! Beautiful words for a beautiful commentary.

  5. Have you ever tried the no-poo method or just hair soap? I wonder if I should give this no-shampoo thing a try or not...


I am happy about every single comment, thanks for sharing your thoughts! Love, Zoey.


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